Wednesday, September 30, 2020



Earlier this month, my husband and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary with a private serenade from the violinist, Cale Brandon.

With a few guests seated in our backyard, socially distanced, Cale took his bow and slid it across the strings of his instrument, and I swear, beneath the sky with a setting sun, the heavens opened! It was truly romantic.

Per my request, the serenade ended with a song I love by the composer, Joe Hisaishi, Memory. Afterward, I shared a running joke about myself. “Everything is about death with you,” a friend teased. “What can I say, I’m fascinated by the subject. After all, at least one character from my books usually gets the ax.”

The group at our anniversary chuckled. “Wouldn’t you know it,” I said. “The song we just danced to, Memory, was from a foreign film. And you guessed it… about death!”

In truth, it is not so much that death intrigues me but what one does with his or her life before transitioning is what I find fascinating. At the point of my toast, I used the analogy of music. When we got engaged, it was at a concert. During our marriage, and to this day, we have date nights. 

We’d often attended the famous Bakers’ Keyboard Lounge in Detroit. And upon adopting our daughter, Faith, the music continued when she’d take her little fingers and intertwine them through ours, making us bob our knees to a musical tune.

In closing, I lifted my glass to the crowd, and said, “Now you all are a part of the fabric of our story. Even during these tumultuous times, music is still at the helm of our lives.” I turned to hubby, and somehow managed to sidestep my usual ugly cry, and said, “Honey, I’m so happy to spend my life with you. I know we will continue to make beautiful music together!”

Thirteen days later, Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. Oh. I did mention this was about a celebration. Indeed, it is, phasing out from this life to the next, leaving the very best part of yourself behind is cause for a celebration, and the onset of a different kind of anniversary!


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